Yesterday
was one of those memorable days to have received entrepreneur award. It’s not
an easy journey. Probably that makes it more ardent.
What I
presented and spoke had appreciations and on demand, I am bringing it to black and
white.
March 8th
2019, 3:30pm.
Since
morning I have received more than 300 messages wishing “Happy Women’s
Day”.
Epitome of
patience, tolerance, understanding, compromise, care, power, share, most
beautiful, acceptance, sacrifice … innumerable number of adjectives. Flowers,
chocolates, brilliantly designed posters… all gets exchanged. A day where
gender-hood is honored and flattered immensely.
Rest of the
year, what we receive is this – Good girls are found in every corner of the
earth. Put your wife’s picture as a
screen saver, when in problem see it, you are confident enough to handle
anything. Happiness isn’t everything, so get married. A quite man is a thinking man, but a quite
woman is usually mad. 😊
Including
women, everyone laughs at that moment and things continue to be in its
place.
A real
women’s day is -
-
A
day where parents don’t distinguish sons and daughters as plus and minus
-
A
day where she feels safe and doesn’t need to feel threatened of trafficking,
infanticide or harassment
-
A
day where no partiality exists for education
-
A
day where marriage becomes free from dowry
-
A
day where she need not have to ask for her percentage of reservation
-
A
day where we need not have to strategically plan for diversity and inclusion.
Change is
always slow, but that change should start from her.
How did we
arrive here? ‘It’s simple’. We believed
in lies. Yes! my friends, #lies that
bind us.
Top three
challenges of women have been – i) Restrictions from family ii) Struggle to retain societal
pressure and prestige iii) Balancing expectations as she shoulders other
responsibilities.
How did we
condition ourselves is because of yet again three predominant traits – Guilt
Feeling, Indecisiveness and Insecurity.
Think about
it my friends – each of them are interrelated.
I would
like to call upon each woman out here to think deeply on lies that has bound us
Societal
Lies: Lies that society conditions us - despite all the newfound opportunity, the
prevailing societal attitudes about what women are historically supposed to
value still have a long way to go.
Your worth
is based on your appearance. Your worth is based on gaining attention and
approval from others, family before career, women are care takers, be passive,
feel shy, coming home late night isnt permitted, girls should sit in a decent
way, working moms exist not working dads, culture, art, music is girls’ world,
if guests come home – girls are expected to serve. The list continues.
Homespun
Lies:
Lies/pressure/compulsions/expectations - your immediate family,
relatives, friends exert on you
Women is
the wheel of the family, you should adjust, you will not get everything you
desire, marriage is happiness; singledom is not, you can’t handle life on your
own, skinny is healthy, fairer is beautiful, value education is mother’s
responsibility… oh! It seems to be a bottomless pit.
Self lies:
Strong beliefs which are eventually lies that has conceived in ourselves or by
your past experiences.
I am an
obliged one and I need to execute my duty in line with expectations from
others. I don’t look good in fancy & modern dresses, being fat is a curse,
how can I have my personal time and space when I have a family??? – Self and
intimate lies of ourselves are much more dangerous to uproot.
Well, we
live & grow with these lies. To put
it into a nutshell, I emphasized on queen bee syndrome and supporting each
other becomes vital to get out of this vicious circle.
We know
lies deceives, lies are expensive, lies conditions our mind, lies kills our
courage and confidence.
I heartily
wish you all that - let all lies die that has conditioned your mind. Support
oneself and others in your fraternity. Let SHE stand for HER.
Let all
lies die that binds us. Wish you all a very happy women’s day.
That was
the snippet shared with audience.
Back home this early morning, March 9th 2019, I saw a message from my current
HR360 Whatsapp group asking what time is the session today.
It was
6:10am, and I replied – I am just entering Bangalore. Let’s meet at 3pm.
Coincidentally,
two replies came back to back – a hour later saying – Mam’, please relax today,
and take the session tomorrow. 😊
An earnest
warm smile filled my face feeling #sheforher.
Change has
started. Even if it is slow, let the day come.
Happy women’s day.
