What is
mindfulness?
Shouldn’t we
know how to regulate stress?
Won't
confidence matter in life!
Shouldn't we
understand the psychology of motivation for things we do!
Isn't
thinking an important concept to be taught?
Isn't most
of our misery around our behaviour, beliefs and relationships around us!
Isn't Self-acceptance
and self-balance an important aspect of building ourselves.
Shouldn't we
learn money management right from when we are adolescents.
Why are these skills aren’t
important to Indian Society?
While there is a hue and cry on Artificial Intelligence
across industry, what makes human as a 'human' is his behaviour, human
characteristics such as critical and creative thinking, emotions, relationships,
decision making skills, presentability, communication to the context, social
skills, contemplation and many more.
More than anything, most important dynamic factor for all
above is - human mind can perceive, imagine and enhance skills substantially and
consistently with conscious effort.
But, why do we still feel that mental health isn’t a great
challenge and problem sounds to be a problem when things are not as expected. Problem
is a problem only when it hits places of concern such as academics, reputation,
& social norms.
Majority of adults including working professionals and
parents seal themselves from learning post graduation or during work life unless
it is corporate sponsorship or credentials oriented. We don’t consider learning
as an investment for life. Learning needs dedication, and as we grow older,
learning and devoting time becomes a last priority and regrettably we cascade
the same mentality to the generations down.
From a personal experience standpoint, I have had parents
approaching me expecting instantaneous results – arrogance, social media addiction,
stressed out, can’t concentrate, gets irritated easily, friend circle is bad,
habits are getting worse etc. But most
importantly alarm rings aloud only when all these are affecting their
academics, grades and CGPA’s. Rest all gets snoozed.
Well, this truth extends as insecurity in leadership, inferiority
complex in speaking up, lacks self-confidence and consistency, or finds too
challenging to take decisions when it comes to working professionals.
Why Indian society is still ignorant about life skills,
mental health, behavioural building, personality and habits and many more.
Reason#1: We still don’t
believe that personality building needs training
Personality just gets built as how we up bring each individual.
We do understand there are parameters around it, but seldom we think that it
can be trained and want to invest on personality building which is an outcome
of our psychology - mind, thinking and feeling-fundamental brick for overall being
and identity. Beauty of this is – it just can start anytime. It only demands
your time, perseverance, thought and conscious effort in implementing changes
you want to instil.
Reason #2: We think
we know it all
There is nothing to be learnt on how to regulate emotions –
we know how it works. We never learnt any while we grew up and aren’t we good
enough to be leading lives.
Of course! We are leading lives, but each generation carries
its own challenges and today’s world needs much more hand holding, attention
and guiding than any other. These subjects are much more complex and abstract
and lies beyond advices and experience sharing.
Emotional Intelligence is a science which encompasses self-introspection,
deep learning, step wise mentoring and transforming into a habit and habit
becomes a behaviour.
Reason #3: We aren’t
able to relate to the results instantaneously
With growth of instant age, expectation on moving things at
a fast pace is demanding which also has influenced the way we connect and convey
results. Instantaneous gratification or immediate outcomes aren’t practical in self-building
process. Growth involves its own ratio and time and it is neither a destination
to have arrived nor a rank to have accomplished. It’s for life. And life is a
long process, we can learn at any juncture, but we use it for life long. That’s
life skills.
Reason #4: We still don’t
believe careers are made complementing our personality
We have many speaking on various other professions to be chosen,
but none want to explore to be first in the list. Earning is important, but
earning is just a by-product too. Various professions earn more as an
individual excels. And being excellence demands motivation, passion & purpose.
But, many of us are doomed out of this truth. We need careers explored,
experimented, well placed, steady promotions, security and titles to flaunt
around with onsite opportunities. Intrinsic motivation, how satisfied &
happy an individual is, takes a last seat. Probably this is the same reason why
we have less than 35% engaged employees in various domains inhibiting us from
being ourselves, loving what we do, and ascending with what we can really thrive
for.
Reason #5: We still don’t
believe in emotional intelligence
EI is a buzzword since more than a decade. I see EI for
leaders, first time managers, leads, senior executives and specialists etc. And the EI workshops are for 3 days to one
week and we expect the world to change. How I wish EI could be taught and effectively
implemented in a week.
We still lack basic awareness on what emotional intelligence
can do for us. IQ is valued more than EQ. But the hard truth is – EQ holds all
your keys. You can regulate any of your quotient if your EQ is in place.
Reason #6: We are
unaware that relationships build on social skills and we can acquire conflict
resolution skills
Relationships are an important part of our lives. Social
skills and conflict resolution are never taught to us in any sense. We imbibe
it observing others or we develop it on priorities and pressures. But, social
intelligence is a beautiful life skill to embed and to connect ourselves with
outer world.
Be it perception we build, living in real or virtual world, developing
relationships across borders and all places we go, conflict is a part of life
and how do we deal with it is more dealt on suggestions, advices, influences,
oppressions or extortions. It does impact our peace of mind. But, we don’t value
this piece because we are unacquainted with ourselves which extend itself for
being ignorant about others presence and identity too.
Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and
he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has a wet paint on it and he'll have to
touch it to be sure.
That’s the state of
our life skills awareness.
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