Thappad - Is it just a movie slap?

I just completed watching the movie ‘Thappad’ on amazon prime. It is 1:40 am and bells are ringing in my mind, thoughts are flowing relentlessly. Feels like a gush of emotions are storming my brain. Memories from my childhood – those lessons of social studies thirty springs ago which I read on female feticide, infanticide, inequality for a girl child, biased in education, discernment at the workplace,….  & even today I teach my son the same chapters – discrimination & biasing.  I looked at the mirror adjacent to my study table and said -  Have we really changed ??

As I stepped into my adolescence  - there was this time I witnessed a series of dowry based movies. Women being burnt, abused, tortured and the list is countless across all Indian languages.  Not far – the recent ‘Jabariya Jodi’ is as well based on dowry reflecting that it still exists, and we all know it does.  So – Have we really changed ??

I have been a very obliging daughter to my parents. I was also told to compromise, adapt, digest, and succumb to demands. I am still expected to be tolerant irrespective of preferences. And when there was a juncture in my life to be vocal about my choices – I had to go through both external and internal struggles and strifes. When I recall it today, I had a few pillars who gave their shoulders to lean on. But eventually who listened to my woes, came to rescue, stood with me were females.  Probably females connect to emotions than a male brain. Point is - there are exceptionally countable few men who can stand for women. Even today – they prefer to stand a mile away.

I have been reading this book ‘Lady you’re the boss’ - & I love this author, she almost makes me feel that she was witnessing snippets of my life secretly from a career-oriented and audacious working women standpoint.  She is able to write and I am able to relate – because both of us are connecting - either have experienced or witnessed an experience. What she narrates a decade ago is valid even today.

• Women are paid less and are evaluated to be delivered below the mark
• Women need to ask for proper hikes, else it just isn’t given
• Women are judged on her looks and appearance
• And if you have been in senior management, you have assorted combats.

Everyday struggles against biasing, demand for promotions & pays, domestic balancing, motherhood guilt – she is still expected to keep up the equity as it is her choice to be career-oriented. Her perpetual war is on from decades.

It makes me think – Have we really changed ??

Let me state as is – from Financial Express dated December 2019 – It is less than 3% of global VC who invest in women-led teams. Isn’t this a Thappad as well?

As an entrepreneur – let me assert – even today many of my friends, particularly males don’t believe in what I do. There are few who outrightly ask ‘Oh! Are you still running your business?’ And there are some silent spectators whispering within – Let’s see what will she do? And those words ‘Oh! & Let’s see’ carry the feelings of either insecurity or animosity.  Yet again, have we really changed?

Women quench her thirst feeling the feel that she is sacred wanted and she is an embodiment of earth & nature to hold all the pains and pangs. On the contrary, men are bought up with the sense that they are protectors & providers.  Changes seem erstwhile and ephemeral. 

If you have reached here, irrespective of gender, drill deep and be fair to ask yourself – Have we changed?? Or Can we change ??