Sunday, December 12, 2010

Confronting The Child Within

"Why are you crying Mommy! Come, I will give you a hug."  Saying so within no second he gave me a warm bear hug with his little hands around my neck. That was my four year old kid just few days back.

I was completely down as I had lost my much-loved uncle and was feeling low, hollow and helpless.
While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about.
The warmth of love was so pure that I wanted my inner child to take birth within me again. I wanted to re-live as a child who just is as innocent and as playful one can think off. I wanted to be a kid again for whom worldly affairs is far off and can see only people it relates to. Energy, creativity, innocence and chastity is so virtuous that it's an ultimatum of being alive.

Call it as ‘divine child', ‘wonder child', ‘inner child', or ‘true self'  or ‘real self', its just that how do we confront a child within all of us.
Undeniably we carry a child within ourselves. This inner child is created by parents, society, and all people who are involved during this augmentation of childhood.
If the child is not heard and accepted, it establishes to create an inter-reliant false self which generates emotional traumas and always feels like victims eventually leading to emptiness, disturbance, zero self confidence with bundle of apprehensions at all stages. On the contrary, the child with attention and acknowledgement builds the fortune for oneself and people around.

But, no one really knows how many people have been loved and guided in healthy ways. So this is one of the most important concepts for us to understand: we all have an inner child, and we have many more inner children inside of us as well. Most people are aware of some of their inner children. The process of opening to the world of the Inner Child enhances our choices in miraculous ways. There are dozens of ways to connect to this wonder kid within which heals, loves and feels happy. In my case, a thousand words might have got communicated which was replaced by a warm hug. That's why a picture dominates a kid's world rather than words. During the transition from childhood the "Wise-kid" becomes dominant with left brain as chief ascendant and keeps beating the inner child to emerge. Adult and Parent of what we address in TA (Transactional Analysis) transpires. This is where often the internal battle begins.
But, a profound thought would be to nurture the inner child with love rather than muffling and secluding it. It heals, it relaxes after all we need some balance out of life and re-living childhood-ness in adulthood is an experience with difference. Its never too late to begin anything.
The wonder kid within has the following faces and all of us live few moments within this nutshell to confront the inner child.
The frisky child is the child which loves to play. It is a frolicsome kid with full of vivacity and exuberance. The energy store house is never empty. There is a spark from within which twinkles with enthusiasm.
The stubborn child which wants what it wants. No compromises. You cannot expect any deal to strike with concession.

The mischievous child is naughty, It is certainly not negative to hurt & harm because adulthood would become alert with super ego to judge.
The fearful child feels scared and in-secured. Some times behaves awful with anxiety. All of us go through this phase one or the other time.
The desolated child strongly feels isolated. Feels comfortable either alone or with selected few based on situations. Not surprisingly, there are circumstances that this feeling of segregation might get extended. But, its alarming if this remoteness continues more than a month.
The inquisitive child – There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of this child.  There are seven million. Curious, interesting, and enquiring seems like an unquenched thirst for this inquisitive child.
This is just an insight towards the possibilities of a child within. There are many other selves as well. In reality all children are imaginative, innovative and artistic, the challenge is to remain one as one grows up.
Its an experience with difference to develop the ability to identify the child within and nourish with adequate attention and admiration to give oneself a profound healing experience.

This is one of the thoughts I always remember when a child within me awakes.

Bitter are the tears of a child: Sweeten them.
Deep are the thoughts of a child: Quiet them.
Intense is the grief of a child: Soothe it.
Soft is the heart of a child: Do not harden it.

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